Anton Semenov

Anton Semenov

He’s here again
he doesn’t think I know
but I know
this is my place
you don’t belong here
I take him unaware
same as always
with the spear first
I thrust right through
his rib cage
at the hinge of the breastplate
it is weak there
it’s always weak there
I smile as I feel the tip
of the weapon
slide through his heart
I can feel it floundering
The impulses travel down the haft
as I feel it desperately trying to beat
but there is no time
for revelry
Now it’s time
for the close work
The up close work
the best part
I drop the spear
and I am on him
like a flash of lightning
My fingers gush with my own
blood as I tear the plates from him
I shear leather and chain
like paper
ripping it out
tearing it and throwing the pieces
high into the air behind me
Like a dog flings earth
as it digs
yes, digging…
digging is another best part
digging comes soon
but not yet
first I get to feel
my heart race
as I reach my hand inside
his armor
this protective blanket
that I hate
I despise
I loathe
I can feel the warmth of his skin
as I grab his unshielded flesh
I squeeze
I feel my nails dig in
His helm!!!
I wrench it off of his head
with my free hand
YES! his eyes
I can see them now
They are panicked
they are full of terror
he is so afraid
he knows what’s coming
he can’t stop it
but I’ve told him
Told him what happens
when he comes here
he doesn’t belong here
this is mine!
my place!
I hunger to taste his blood
spit dribbles down my chin
in anticipation
I feel his fear and I can smell
its primitive power
white-hot frustration
the agony of being kept here
he doesn’t know it
except when I have him
have him like this
then he knows
he knows what I feel
every day
as he leaves me here
he goes to be with her
they languish together
the two of them
in his clean white world
pushing flowers through a pen
I hate his face
I want to tear into his lips
with my teeth
hear him scream
feel him struggle to get away
like he is doing now
pushing with all of his
Goody-goody might
but I am too strong
this is my place
he doesn’t belong here
I’ve clawed his gorget loose
His throat is exposed
I will sink my teeth in
ah, yes..the screaming…
The struggle
I am 1000 times stronger than he is
I pull back with his red-hot blood dripping down my face
I grin wide so he can see my canines
Do you understand?
do you?
This is my place
you leave me here
where there is no light
no dark
no stars
no music
You leave me here
no water
no food
and you go back to that other place
with her
and you decide
if we talk
if we eat
if we drink
if we sleep
if we fuck
emotions that well up out of the ground here
like flowers
in a lost and forsaken wasteland of dreams
You dare to tread here
what do you hope to see?
not this?
not what resides here when you leave
shall I tell you about the days and the nights?
shall I have you hear the shrieking?
The mournful howls that roll over these hills
in the umbra?
you sleep in unfettered beauty
with her…ever watchful
you sleep in safety..
while I curl up on bare rock
holding my spear
and waiting for whatever horror
will stalk me now
there are things here that you have created
things that break our mind
but you don’t see the cracks
She hands you a paintbrush
and you don’t see any of it
you gelding warhorse
your hoof-beats make me cringe
your armor is always so shiny
your smile ever so bright
I hate that we need you
I hate that we must have this face
this face that I can’t wait
to throw dirt on
when I bury you
I’ll sever your head with the spade
this time
I’ll leave it on the ground
near the grave
and I hope
that when the weight of the ground
is crushing you
when the dirt and the grime
is mixing with your hemorrhaging
river of blood
and you are gagging and choking
on the loam
Created by your death throes
I hope you remember…

this is my place

you don’t belong here…

About Eric

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35 Responses to id..

  1. ChinGum says:

    woaa…very nice poem. very well written.

  2. Meg Sorick says:

    Right! What Vic said… a frenzy! Wild and out of control. I love it for all its howling anger and violence. Whew, my friend…

  3. Eric says:

    Thank you, Vic. Ids are scary things

  4. RAS says:

    Ok! Nobody move. My lil’ brother wants to kick some ass! Bro, would it be OK if I printed this and put on former manager’s desk?

  5. Kate Spyder says:

    Eric…. I hesitate to say… I know this isn’t me, and yet it is, and isn’t. I know you dug deep for this one. It resonates of those deep emotions we tend to bury and pretend they don’t exist. In fact, until I read this, I would not have believed they resided in me, and yet they do and don’t, because they aren’t mine. They are yours. Thank you for sharing. I felt blessed and honored to be given a glimpse into the person you are and the person who can so excellently express with pen and ink. Take care. ~Kate

    • Eric says:

      Thank you, Kate. I appreciate that you can see the depth of it. and I really appreciate you taking the time to tell me that you do. ❤

  6. maharedwynn says:

    Wow, Eric! Such rage! I hope that helped you blow off some steam! And you’re ok…. 😳

  7. Speechless! Horrified! Thrilled! 😊

  8. Eric says:

    Thank you, Mandi!

  9. What a pencil effin ride

  10. moonskittles says:

    And how am I going to sleep tonight?? This should come with a warning: not for the faint of heart, or scardy skittled cats 🙂

  11. augustmacgregor says:

    Eric, this was intense. What a wild ride through this poem — felt like I had ring-side seats at the battle!

  12. jrd1974 says:

    Like, are you a vampire?

  13. Creepy photo, my friend. Creepy. So perfect for the justified fury, the violent rage of the id before smothered by our “reasonable” psyche. This is so pure, it’s beautiful in its disturbing nature. Nicely done!

  14. Eric says:

    Thank you, Em. It was very difficult to write in some parts. ❤

  15. thefeatheredsleep says:

    You flay yourself with truth here. You may erode your soul in order to rid yourself but you give such language to it, the torture itself is addictive. That part of you may not belong, or it may, but either way, the removal, the fight, you’ve brought it to life in your words.

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